• Harry Van Koll


Updated: Apr 27, 2019

Why would you need to BE YOURSELF more confidently?

You can’t be anymore ‘yourself’ than who you are already.

You CAN ONLY be yourself.

And if you don’t believe that who you are is good enough, then you’re probably pretending to be someone else that you are not.

And all this is doing is taking you further and further away from who you really are.

But who YOU really are is all you actually need to be.

In fact, did you know that you are the best person that there is in the entire universe to be YOU And did you realise that if you were just being who you are truthfully and openly, you wouldn’t need any confidence because it DOESN’T require any effort to be YOU.

In fact the easiest thing that you could possibly do is to be yourself.

It requires NO EFFORT.

It’s only when you start TRYING to be something that you are not, that you start to disconnect from who you really are and this is what can turn into anxiety. You start trying to become who you ‘think’ you are meant to be and put so much pressure on yourself and it becomes exhausting.

But realising who you truly are isn’t about adding more ‘you’, it’s about letting go of everything that YOU are not.

You see, being YOU is EFFORTLESS.

You can’t not be you.

Tricking yourself into thinking that you need to be something more that what you already are right now is the very root of anxiety.

Because it disconnects you from yourself and causes you to feel powerless in your life and in the moment of an anxiety attack, but that fear of something being ‘wrong’ or ‘not normal’ is only because you’ve temporarily forgotten who you are.

And it’s like you’re actually ignoring yourself.

And that feeling of ‘something is wrong’ during an anxiety or panic attack is like the YOU within trying to communicate with the ‘you’ without to tell you to listen to yourself.

It’s like the inner and outer selves have become misaligned.

And this only happens when you try to be something that you are not - and this begs the question, what don’t you like about the YOU that you really are?

And the answer to that is all that’s in the way of you reconnecting with yourself.

Because being yourself, being you, doesn’t require any effort. In fact you have to put a lot of effort into not being who you are and this becomes so debilitating and exhausting after a while.

But you shouldn’t have to TRY to be you.

You just are.

If you can’t do that it’s because you don’t want to. There’s something about yourself you don’t like, so you try to be something different.

Ask yourself what that is.

Meditate on that.

Really think about it.

Because there is definitely something there stopping you from wanting to be yourself.


It’s like when you try to hear something that’s really quiet or faint in the distance. And you try to strain and squeeze your ear as if it will somehow make you be able to hear more. But hearing isn’t something that you must strain to be able hear more. You don’t hear more by trying to hear more. Hearing becomes more clear when you relax your ear, let go and take all of the sound in.

Same with eye sight. We strain our eyes when we try to see something way off in the distance or see something in front of us more clearly. And we squeeze our eyes as if it will somehow increase our eyesight. But your eyes don’t take more light in just because you’re straining them.

You take MORE light in by relaxing and opening them.

We can see much better when we relax our eyes and just take all of that light in at once and then we REALLY see.

It’s like a hunting animal stalking its prey, it doesn’t strain its eyes when it latches on.

It doesn’t TRY to see more clearly, no. It becomes so very still, and widens and relaxes it eyes and takes the light from the entire picture in all at once - without trying.

You can’t be yourself by trying to be more of yourself.

It’s not about being something more than you you are.

It’s about NOT trying to be something that you aren’t 😉

Simply, it’s about letting go of what you are not.

And being YOU in this moment.

If you can’t do that, ask yourself why?


I help people beat their anxiety so they can reconnect with who they really are and move forward in their lives.


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