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  • Writer's pictureHarry Van Koll

YOU NEED TO REPAIR YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOURSELF TO MOVE BEYOND THE ANXIETY AND FEAR IN YOUR LIFE.


Anxiety is the result of what happens when you lose touch with that deep connection you NEED to have with yourself in the present moment.


There are many external factors that can lead to this disconnection.


Too much outside programming and overthinking from the fear that media creates, the stresses of work, the pressures of society and social situations can seperate the ‘mind’ from the ‘self’. This separation is exactly what leads to fear and self-doubt.


The mind worries.


And when the mind becomes disconnected or ungrounded from who YOU are in the present moment, it is then free to worry endlessly and without measure.


The mind can only think. Endlessly.


When this goes to the unchecked extreme there is no end to it, because thought will keep thinking and thinking, and then start thinking about thought itself, because that is what it does by it’s own nature.


The mind, if left unchecked, will always endlessly compute and analyse - it needs something to ground it or else it will never stop.


The ungrounded mind is like an untamed animal that is only reactive to its environment and has no control of itself when faced with external stimulus.


The mind must be tamed.


Because an ungrounded mind left to its own devices will before you know it have you living in a world of constant worry, fear and self-doubt based on ideas and thoughts that have no actual ‘grounding’ in reality and aren’t actually ‘here’ in the ‘now’.


This creates an anxiety that is behind all of the feelings of helplessness and of being stuck where you are in your life - with no apparent reason as to why or knowing how to get out of it.

But this anxiety has no grounding here and now.


Anxiety is fear of what COULD happen, based on thoughts thinking about thoughts about thoughts.


The remedy to this is to take charge of your mind in the present moment and decide to take responsibility of choosing your thoughts, and not have them choose themselves.


You need to find out who YOU are in the present moment, and start to build a relationship with that person again.


Because the only reason you can become anxious or have a panic attack is because you temporarily feel powerless and fear what is happening in the moment or what could happen.

But you can only fear the moment if you doubt yourself in the moment.


You MUST do the inner work.


You must face yourself.


You need to repair and build the relationship you have with yourself so you are grounded in who YOU are all the time.


The best way to do this and to test your relationship with yourself is to create time and space in your life to do absolutely NOTHING.


Create time, maybe an afternoon or morning where you will do absolutely nothing at all. No agenda, no distractions, no expectations, no rules, no goal, no deadlines, NOTHING. And just find a comfortable space where you won’t be disturbed or distracted and just exist in the moment with yourself. And then start to notice how you feel. Start to notice how easy or difficult this is.


You may be confronted with anxious or worrisome thoughts.


Investigate them and their merit.


Notice what happens and what comes up.


If you find things that need dealing with, set them aside for now to be dealt with later (and make sure you do deal with them later!). But for the purposes of this exercise, just re-ground yourself back to here and now. Keep doing this.


You may be hit by frustrating boredom. Persevere it!


Any feeling that arises here will show you the state of the current relationship you have with yourself, because when you eliminate all distraction and stimuli, you are only left with YOU.


You need to get to the point where you can do this easily and even look forward to it. Because when you start to look forward to being with yourself, you have repaired your relationship with who YOU are to the extent that you realise YOU are all you need in the present moment.


You will then start to trust in who YOU are more.


And when you trust yourself in the present moment, you no longer fear the thoughts you may have because you realise they were a misperception of your reality that you were creating from a disconnected state.


You start to trust the constructive thoughts that you now realise YOU are creating, and these begin to trump the fearful thoughts that are born from external stimuli - from disconnection. The connection you have with YOU in the present moment becomes stronger than any external influence that may attempt to sway you or that used to upset you.


There is a part of you deep within yourself, that goes beyond the restrictive limitations of thought and worry, that once you connect to, allows you to liberate yourself from the seemingly endless cycles of anxiety, fear and self-doubt.


When you reconnect to this part of yourself, you become grounded in the ‘here’ and ‘now’, and this is the very essence of who YOU are.


It is YOU.


You are here.


You are now.


And when you start to build a loving relationship with that person again, you get back in touch with the powerful person that you ALWAYS were...


You had just forgotten it.


...

I help people break through the anxiety-cycle so they are finally free to reconnect with who they truly are and can move forward in their lives.

Book your free Anxiety Clarity Session here:

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