• Harry Van Koll

You will never ‘FIND YOURSELF’ by pretending that you haven’t yet!

You’ll never ‘FIND YOURSELF’ by pretending that you haven’t yet!

You are ALWAYS right here, exactly where you are.

The real question is then, what is not enough about YOU, right now?

An even better way to ask this is, why are you PRETENDING that you aren’t ENOUGH for YOU, right now?

Who’s standards are those anyway?

Are the yours?

If not, what are you getting from trying to live up to somebody else’s expectations?

You can never reach somebody else’s standards - because they‘re not yours. That’s an impossible goal that will have you chasing that ‘carrot on a stick’ for the rest of your life!

If the standards are yours, ARE THEY REALLY?

Have a think about that...

Are you sure they are YOURS?

If it’s still yes, what are you doing with these expectations? Are you trying to impress yourself? What happens if you fail to meet these? Who are you upsetting then?

Really think about that...

Is it still you?

If yes, who is the ‘YOU’ that is upset by what the ‘other you’ did?

Are there two of ‘you’?


Let me ask that initial question again, that might help us a bit more here now:

WHY on Earth are you PRETENDING that YOU aren’t good enough for YOU?

There cannot be TWO of YOU!

But what does that mean??

Well if there’s only one YOU, there’s no ‘other you’ to be ‘good enough’ for, right?

Meditate on that for a while...

What are you getting from living out this impossible, double-bind?

You’ll probably eventually come to the conclusion that on some level you realise these standards are not actually yours.

You may have always thought they were yours, but just think about this: If they weren’t yours, who’s might they be?

Any ideas?

You can’t keep looking to somebody else for measurement of YOUR own goodness!

Because you’ll never get it that way!

Because really, as long as you keep doing that, it won’t even be YOUR goodness anyway!

It will always be theirs.

Your GOODNESS is already enough.

If you can’t see that right now, it’s only because you’re not looking for it where it is!

If you’re always looking for somebody else’s approval, you will never see YOU.

Start seeing yourself with your own eyes!

Because if you truly do turn around and FACE yourself, you will never have to ‘FIND’ yourself.





I’m a Conversational Hypnotherapist specialise in helping people completely break free from Anxiety so they can reconnect with they TRULY ARE.

I help people achieve this in my Anxiety Breakthrough Transformation™

You can schedule a Free 45min Anxiety Strategy Phone Call with me below so we can have a chat about your specific situation and what you would like to achieve through working together to finally overcome your Anxiety and start LIVING.

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